My first ever relationship lasted for five days.

I was 13, and he was a bit of a ‘badboy’. I tried to impress him by ripping out a corner from a page of a textbook (I wouldn’t rip out the entire page, I didn’t want detention) and writing my mobile number on it. We decided, in that history class, to be boyfriend and girlfriend. At the end of the lesson, the substitute teacher came over to me and said “You can do better”. I knew I could. But I wanted a boyfriend so that I would be normal.

He kept trying to put his tongue in my mouth when we went to kiss, which I didn’t like. He said we could “Go ‘round the back of the shop near mine” so we could kiss some more. I didn’t want that. The next day I was poorly, so I had the day off. I got a text from a friend saying that my amazing boyfriend had dumped me. I texted back “ok”. I wasn’t heartbroken — I was relieved. We haven’t spoken since.

My second ‘relationship’ — if you could even call it that, which you won’t — was when I was about 14. We chatted on MySpace for a bit and then he asked me to be his girlfriend. We met up that following Saturday for the first time, walked around HMV, had a milkshake, and then sat in the park with our friends. I hated it. It didn’t feel right at all. Plus he stank of fags. I texted him that evening before starting my 5hr shift at a restaurant which I hated, saying that I didn’t want to be his girlfriend anymore. He never texted back. This relationship lasted longer than my first relationship — a solid six days. We haven’t spoken since.

No more relationship/dating things for seven years.

I didn’t have my first Actual Factual This Is A Date date until I was 21. At this point I was starting to accept that I was probably bisexual, but I was definitely more interested in boys.

We matched on a dating site and chatted for about a week or so. I really wanted to see Wreck It Ralph at the cinema so asked if he wanted to come with me. He was late so I, of course, took to twitter to have a whinge. Then I met him in the flesh and we really didn’t click. We went and watched the film and barely spoke to one another, then I made my excuses and said goodbye. Again, I took to twitter to have a moan. About an hour later I get a message from him saying that he had found my twitter and he didn’t want to speak to me again. I gave Wreck It Ralph 8/10. We haven’t spoken since.

My next date was when I was 23 and, drum-roll, it was with a girl! We met at a mutual friend’s wedding and she just so happened to live a short train journey — or long bus journey if I was feeling adventurous, which I never was — away. We exchanged numbers and pleasantries at the wedding and texted frequently. I really liked her, so I plucked up the courage to ask if she wanted to go out for a pizza after work one night. She said yes. After one or two more dates, we decided to give a relationship a go. We were in a Harvester in Ipswich when we became girlfriends, and then we saw The Grand Budapest Hotel at the cinema.

This was my first proper relationship, and at the time I labelled myself as pansexual which meant that I was definitely attracted to all genders. We saw each other once a week, sometimes twice if I was lucky, held hands and had cuddles. It was a relationship that I wanted to be in and felt comfortable being in. With males, I didn’t feel comfortable at all. But I was definitely pansexual.

The relationship lasted just over six months and it ended amicably. We haven’t spoken since.

The next relationship (still pansexual) was one that I don’t really call a ‘relationship’. They were in a polyamorous relationship with a guy and I was just …there. They called me their girlfriend, but I felt like a backup. To me, it felt like I wanted to see them more than they wanted to see me. But I didn’t want to be someone’s sometimes. This went on for about six months when I was 24/25, until it got to the point where I was on a night out and a girl wanted to kiss me but her boyfriend was there and (surprise surprise!) I tweeted about not wanting to be someone’s sometimes. They saw it and had it out with me and said they didn’t want me to be their girlfriend anymore. We haven’t spoken since.

Between this relationship ending and the next one beginning, I came out as a full-time lesbian.

I wanted to do things right with this girl. She was someone who I had known and had a crush on for a fair few years, and I knew had been treated badly in the past.

I invite her to stay at mine as there’s a gay night on in town. She accepts. We laugh, we drink, we dance. We kiss. We …y’know! We wake up the next morning in bed together holding hands. “Oh god”, I think to myself, “I super bloody fancy her”.

It’s her birthday a few weeks later and I ask if she would like to meet up at the weekend in London so we could celebrate. She says yes and we have a lovely evening together being silly. We laugh, we drink, we kiss, we do what we did before. Again, we wake up holding hands. “Oh god”, I think to myself, “I wonder if we’ll fall in love”.

The next day, I’m an idiot wearing high shoes and I fall over and scrape my knee up pretty good. She sits me down and dashes off to the nearest pharmacy to grab me a plaster. She comes back with a medikit that would make even Lara Croft jealous. She helps bandage me up. “Oh god”, I think to myself, “She is probably The One”. We go to the cinema and have a pizza and then we part ways.

On September 20th 2016 (the day after I sent her some flowers saying “Thank you for a lovely weekend”, after I changed the message from “Will you be my girlfriend?”) I ask her if she would like to give a relationship a go. She says yes. I am very happy. She is very happy. We are still very happy.

A year and a half later, on the mornings where we wake up holding hands — and the mornings where we don’t; “Oh god,” I think to myself, “She is My One”.

I know the phrase “You’ve got to kiss a few frogs until you find your Prince Charming” is silly. Not just because frogs are great and kissing one wouldn’t be the end of the world, but sometimes you can find your Forever Person without looking very hard. But if that’s if you know who the Forever You genuinely is.

It’s okay to try things out and test the waters with other people if you’re unsure. There’s no harm in that. It’s all part of life’s big tapestry. But once you’ve accepted who you are, that’s when things can become just that little bit more beautiful.